That phrase, "the grass is always greener on the other side," definitely has merit. I've had a ton of married people tell me I should enjoy my single life. I can go and do whatever I want, when I want to do it. That's true, but apparently these married people don't remember what it was like to be single sometimes, or maybe they didn't have to worry about it for as long as I have. Either way, I've been having a little bit of a rough time this last week.
You see, I had a date over the weekend. It was a set up by a friend and honestly, the date went well. I didn't see any glaring reasons why I shouldn't want to go out with him again. I mean, the way he "asked me out" to begin with left a little to be desired, but I try to be a go with the flow kind of person and figured I wouldn't worry about it.
However... he started getting a little overzealous after that. He texted me morning, noon, and night every day after our date. He would say kind of odd things that made him sound like he was a little too into me. I even had to tell him to simmer down, that we needed to take it one day at a time. I was starting to get annoyed.
I could already tell, based on the fact that I was already annoyed, that this would probably not be a long term solution to being single, but because my friend set us up and because she assured me he was a great guy, I wanted to give it a shot, even though I could see the writing on the wall. Until last night.
He pretty much insulted me in a text last night. I know texting is not a great way to communicate when you're trying to get to know a person, but it seems to be what guys are the most comfortable with these days, and I'll be honest, with the way I have been feeling about him, I am more comfortable with texting too. He asked me a question and whenever I answered him, he laughed at my answer and compared what I said to other girls he knows. Well, great for you that you know other girls that do this thing differently. Go date one of them! That's when I pretty much knew there was not going to even be a second date.
I haven't broken the news to him yet, but it's coming. I had a really hard time after that realization, though. I'm depressed. I was really hoping this guy might be different. I was really hoping that this would be a two-sided relationship for once, instead of the guy liking me more than I do or me liking the guy more. I was really hoping that he would be the answer to the prayers I've been praying for the past few months. I think that was the hardest pill to swallow. I went back and forth between thinking that I guess this was just something random and not the answer, to wondering if I was just not being open to the answer. Which is it? If I pass this guy up because he's overzealous and kind of an arrogant ass (pardon my french), then am I passing up on God's answer to my single life? I just don't know.
So... I need some prayer. I hate asking for prayer all the time for this kind of stuff, but it's really got me down. I know the grass isn't always greener on the married side of life, but I'm just tired of this roller coaster.